Madison is probably best described as me at sixteen. I was overweight. I struggled with it since I was little – still do, but the fact remains, what she feels, I felt (and sometimes still do). I didn’t feel attractive. I had crushes on guys who only saw me as “friends,” but I knew the truth, even if they did “like” me as more, they wouldn’t date me because I was fat.
Madison is the same way. She doesn’t think anyone could ever find her attractive, even herself, but most of all, she’s searching for something. Acceptance, love, happiness. But, she has a hard time finding it.
I think this piece I wrote about my Mads really sums up how she feels. I wanted to share it with y’all because it’s so important to the story. It’s about how she feels about mirrors. And, sometimes, I wonder if all women don’t feel the same way about it at times.
So, if you’re wondering what’s going through Madison’s head, it’s this.
I hate you. I really do. You show me for what I really am. A fat nobody. I see the lumps, the rolls, the fat. You’re nothing to me but damage. Damage to my soul. My blue eyes stare back at me, but they’re empty, void of the emotion and happiness I should feel while staring at myself. Why can’t I feel beautiful? Why won’t you let me be beautiful?
This is just a snippet of how Madison feels, but I think it gets us inside her head a little more. Sure, the book is told from her point of view, but I think this really sums up the entire book in just a few sentences. Madison is insecure and looking for acceptance. All she wants is to feel something – to feel beautiful.
I think we all feel that way at some point in our lives, and I’m hoping that Madison’s story will help through those times. This book is written for young adults, but I think everyone will get something out of it.
Don’t forget, you can still enter to win this week’s New Release Giveaway! What is it? An autographed tote and “God Makes Beautiful Things” notebook!