Discouragement…

I think sometimes discouragement hits us, and we don’t even know we’re discouraged until we just sit down and face it head on.

Let me explain.  Yesterday, I had sat down and was finally going to edit my vampire/werewolf novel after a few weeks of not working at all.  And, I didn’t know why I wasn’t working.  Sure, I’ve been busy.  Swamped actually.  But I’ve always found time to write or edit or do what I had to in order to keep this writing thing going.

So, I couldn’t explain to you why I haven’t been writing – until now.  I was discouraged with my work.  I think it’s because it’s new to me.  This genre I’m working on is new and some people hate it, some love it.  It’s either a hit or miss in this genre, and that scares me.  And, I realized some of my stuff was a bit cliched and cookie cutter (thanks to a beta reader) and now, I’m even more discouraged.  Sure, I can fix it, but I thought it was good.

Honestly, I read through it again a few months ago and thought, “Hey, this isn’t so bad!”  And now where am I left?  Holding the crumbling pieces of a novel that apparently has a horrible main character and is a “rip-off of Twilight.”  Honestly, I don’t think it’s a rip-off of Twilight.  At least not all of it.  I’ve done research into werewolves and wolves, and no, my research wasn’t watching the Twilight films or reading the books.

But, still, I’m upset.  Crying upset.  My novel sucks.  This idea I had and loved might suck.  I’m an awful author.

I wanted to try something new, but now, I’m not sure I want to continue with it.

How do you as an author overcome discouragement?  How do you find the momentum and good in your writing to keep going sometimes?

My boyfriend and family tell me constantly that I worry too much.  I do.  I won’t deny it, but sometimes, that worry has me so crippled that I can’t even find the worth in my own work.  It’s debilitating.  And sometimes, it makes me want to give up, but when I look at the good reviews on Amazon and Goodreads that I have or when I remember the good things that people have told me regarding my writing, it makes it easier.

I’m not saying that it’s easy because it’s not.  Right now, I’m having a hard time overcoming this discouragement, and I still want to cry some.  However, I must go on.  I must find the strength to keep writing because dang it, that’s what I do best!  God gave me this talent, and I plan on using it!